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Pirate Rants

The Pirate Nation

Issue date: 6/17/09 Section: Opinion
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To the hot girl I pass every day on the way to class: I purposely leave at 11:16 to pass you at the same place every day!



I now know what its like to get drunk and lose your car...



I only made out with you to get you sick.



1000 beers in 3 months. Can you do it?



Life's too short to smoke cheap pot.



I'm confused about that baby corn stuff you get in Chinese food. It looks like corn, but doesn't taste like corn. So is it corn...?



I should never drink again so that I won't create any more awkward moments in my life.



Really Still Life? Why are your cards at everyone else's bar?



I'm used to being harassed by "preachers" and homeless people on my way to the bar but not downtown bar employees trying to get me to go to their bar. Can y'all please stop?



There is no describing the level of laziness I've reached this summer. Ahhhh so relaxing



I miss my ECU friends! I'm so ready to move back!



So we just witnessed the World Series preview ... Philly vs. Boston? ... yea



Dear ECU Scheduling Committee, Why must you schedule all of the camps during the same week? Love, the Summer School Students



Just because your bra straps are clear, doesn't mean we can't see them. Invest in a new bra.



Working at the YMCA has changed my views on the importance of condom usage.



My diet consists of alternating ice cream and bagels with the occasional trip to taco bell. Is it weird I miss the dining hall?



It disturbs me that I had sex with a guy that likes Moulin Rouge so much that he had to become a fan of it on Facebook.
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Dan

posted 6/19/09 @ 3:16 PM EST

I surely hope that you can get through one thousand beers in three months. At a rate of 30 days per month, that is just over eleven beers a day. If you cannot do this, you do not deserve to be enrolled at East Carolina. (Continued…)

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