Spring Break
Pirate Rants
The Pirate Nation
Issue date: 4/14/09 Section: Opinion
Have you ever seen an ugly Asian girl? I mean, seriously, I'm moving to Japan.
I'm sorry I wrote that song saying I love you. Can we at least be friends again?
That was just weird. I should probably cut down on the drugs.
You know I'm amazing and you want to have my babies.
If you think that taking a 15-minute shower every Wednesday makes up for the fact that you don't shower for the rest of the week ... you are sooo WRONG! Smell yourself for a change.
Dear roommate, I am sorry that my family does not like you much ... but maybe if you didn't try to start so much drama, they might.
Again, how childish are you that we can't have the same friends?
I know there's tall, grande and venti, but what do you say when you just want the coffee in an IV drip?
To the person who asked, "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" The egg came first. It belonged to a fish. Pick up a biology book and read the chapters about evolution.
To the blonde guy in my personal finance class: Stop being so hot. It's driving me crazy!
My roommate's dog barks ALL the time. If it doesn't stop, I am selling it on eBay!
It's too bad you're not like all the other guys. Sometimes I really just want to have sex with you and be done with it.
My friend told me I was his own personal brand of heroin. Does that mean he can't get enough of me but at the same time I am ruining his life?
My fellow Somalians, why aren't you saying "arghh" when you take over those ships?
So today, I saw a guy driving on the wrong side of the road at 12 in the afternoon ... nice.
What do hotdogs without buns have to do with car insurance?
My friends told me that I should go to rehab. I was like… the lounge or the real one?
Can a red-green color blind person ever truly experience Valentine's Day and Saint Patrick's Day?
I overheard two girls on the bus talking about how excited they were for Easter ... because Lent was over and they could drink again. God bless 'em.
I'm sorry I wrote that song saying I love you. Can we at least be friends again?
That was just weird. I should probably cut down on the drugs.
You know I'm amazing and you want to have my babies.
If you think that taking a 15-minute shower every Wednesday makes up for the fact that you don't shower for the rest of the week ... you are sooo WRONG! Smell yourself for a change.
Dear roommate, I am sorry that my family does not like you much ... but maybe if you didn't try to start so much drama, they might.
Again, how childish are you that we can't have the same friends?
I know there's tall, grande and venti, but what do you say when you just want the coffee in an IV drip?
To the person who asked, "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" The egg came first. It belonged to a fish. Pick up a biology book and read the chapters about evolution.
To the blonde guy in my personal finance class: Stop being so hot. It's driving me crazy!
My roommate's dog barks ALL the time. If it doesn't stop, I am selling it on eBay!
It's too bad you're not like all the other guys. Sometimes I really just want to have sex with you and be done with it.
My friend told me I was his own personal brand of heroin. Does that mean he can't get enough of me but at the same time I am ruining his life?
My fellow Somalians, why aren't you saying "arghh" when you take over those ships?
So today, I saw a guy driving on the wrong side of the road at 12 in the afternoon ... nice.
What do hotdogs without buns have to do with car insurance?
My friends told me that I should go to rehab. I was like… the lounge or the real one?
Can a red-green color blind person ever truly experience Valentine's Day and Saint Patrick's Day?
I overheard two girls on the bus talking about how excited they were for Easter ... because Lent was over and they could drink again. God bless 'em.
Viewing Comments 1 - 7 of 11
Richelle T.
posted 4/14/09 @ 12:19 PM EST
The next time you have something negative to say dont say it behind my back to the other roommate thinking she is not going to tell me...I talk to her more than you do!
Mel
posted 4/14/09 @ 1:07 PM EST
"Have you ever seen an ugly Asian girl? I mean, seriously, I'm moving to Japan"
Hahahaha. Oh man, I met dudes like you in my JET program. Have fun getting to Japan and calling all the girls stuck-up because they're just as uninterested in you as American women are. (Continued…)
jimbo327
posted 4/14/09 @ 1:20 PM EST
What were the last words of the Somali Pirates "Look At The Cute Seals"
Kyle
posted 4/14/09 @ 5:14 PM EST
LOL. I'm still amazed at how stupid people around here are. Everyone's all like, "Yeah! Pirates! ARRRRGH!"
I'm like, "No, you morons. These aren't Disney characters. (Continued…)
Umm?
posted 4/15/09 @ 10:15 AM EST
So why is it that whenever it rains in Greenville, there is like nine accidents simultaneously? I know the drivers are bad but I mean really?
Why
posted 4/15/09 @ 12:40 PM EST
can we not find actual, dirty, hungry Somalian pirates to be fun and cool, especially when they get shot in the head for jacking an American ship carrying relief supplies for. (Continued…)
Seriously
posted 4/15/09 @ 10:11 PM EST
to the person that owns a dog in white.. you arent sneaky. we can all hear it barking.
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